The secret of The Secret. How I use the Law of Attraction without realising it.
I did not believe in the Law of Attraction until I look back and realise how often it has manifested. I now think I know how it works.
It is about this book, The Secret. I was extremely sceptical of the idea that if you think it, it will manifest. There is no scientific evidence of the “Universe” conspiring to fulfil my every wish, or a genie-god granting gifts simply because I want it. There is just no such thing! Success is the product of hard work and maybe luck.
I was wrong.
Looking back, I missed an important lesson about the Law of Attraction, and how I have used it all my life without realising it.
But The Secret is not what I thought it was.
I first came across The Secret in its video format:
A business associate and friend, who made his fortune in the used car business, gave it to me. I often asked him about the secret of his success, and he spoke passionately about how he struggled in his youth in the early 80s. How he built one of the largest, most successful car dealerships in Singapore. He said that his life changed when he changed the way he thinks.
In The Secret, it said:
The law of attraction simply gives you whatever it is you are thinking about.
“Come on! This is mumbo jumbo marketing to sell books and videos. How can it possibly be real?”
I put it aside and thought I had stopped thinking about it. But the law of attraction was already at work.
In retrospect, I see how often I may have unconsciously used this law to achieve my goals. I do not think these appeared out of nowhere. I have a simpler explanation. But first, let me share some “manifestations” from my past.
The Kung Fu Manual
This is silly, but true. And a little creepy.
Growing up, I was fond of Kung Fu movies and TV dramas. I often imagined myself as a Kung Fu expert, fending off bullies in my neighbourhood and school.
When I was 13, I watched a TV drama called “Young Wong Fei Hung”. In one episode, the hero found a secret manual (工字伏虎拳), some kind of Tiger-style Kung Fu that he eventually learned and used to defeat the villain. I thought that if I could get a hold of a copy, I could learn and fight like him. Wouldn’t that be cool…
About 2 months later, I found a used copy in a second-hand bookshop at Bras Basah Complex. It was $5.90.
Buying our dream flat
When my wife and I got married, the first thing we did was apply for a new government flat in the estate of Punggol, Singapore.
But we would have loved to live in the beautiful estate next to the Sembawang river. We passed it often on our way home. The buildings were unique, and we loved the roof gardens. It was impossible because all units were sold years ago. But wouldn’t it be nice…
About a year later, we received a letter from the government asking if we would like to consider some units had become available because buyers had pulled out. There were 3 units from Sembawang, 1 unit next to the river. We would go on a queue, and if we didn’t get it, we could then return to the usual waiting list for Punggol.
We came up № 1 in the queue. And we picked our “impossible” dream flat overlooking the river.
Migrating to Australia
When we fell in love with Australia in 2001, we wanted to migrate here. After our first trip, my wife and I did some research, and we compiled a list of conditions to make the move. One of the biggest obstacles was a deposit of AUD$100,000 in Australian government bonds. That was when the Australian dollar was much stronger than Singapore dollar. This was to show that we have the funds to support ourselves if visa was granted.
We were both new in our career, with a mortgage and renovation debt. We could not imagine how we could raise the funds to do this. We wrote a 5-year timeline for our migration goal. We couldn’t see how it was possible. But wouldn’t it be nice…
In January 2009, we received news from our migration agent that our application was successful, and we were here in Australia on 15 May 2009. It came a bit late, but it came.
Owning our home in Australia
We started off renting when we first migrated. After months of looking for a job, I found work as a clerk. My pay was barely enough to cover rent and groceries. We had two very young children and often had to search for loose change around the house before pay day on Thursday. We thought life will be a struggle in the coming years.
We talked about buying our forever home one day. The price of a 2-bedroom house where we lived was beyond what we could afford. We said we should rent to avoid taking on a huge mortgage, especially when things are so uncertain. But wouldn’t it be nice…
On a drive in December 2012, we discovered a nice, little suburb in the South. It was an eco village. A quick search showed that prices here were more affordable. My wife got in touch with a few villagers and by the end of January 2013, we have bought a plot. We now live in our 3-bedroom home in one of the most beautiful places in Australia.
I am now thinking about a small portfolio of investment properties to earn passive income when I retire. Wouldn’t it be nice…
You become what you think about most,
but you also attract what you think about most.
There is no secret
In the book, writer Rhonda Byrne said that positive energy attracts positive things. By thinking positive thoughts, individuals can manifest desired outcomes.
This is similar to Napoleon Hill’s “Think and Grow Rich”. His other book, “Positive Thinking,” also spoke about staying focused on goals and how to turn problems into opportunities.
My personal take on this is that thoughts changes behaviour. I do not subscribe to the mystical universe, a personal genie-in-a-bottle explanation of the good things that happened in my life.
I think it results from a much more common thing called the “Yellow Car” phenomenon.
The “Yellow Car” phenomenon
This is also known as selective attention. When you are thinking of something, like buying a yellow car, your brain becomes more attuned to noticing “yellow cars” around you. It’s not that there are suddenly more yellow cars on the road; rather, your perception has shifted to focus on them.
If you want to change anything in your life, change the channel
and change the frequency by changing your thoughts.
This, I believe, is how our attention shapes our reality. This is the Law of Attraction, and the secret of Positive Thinking.
In all the situations that I shared, and there were more, I have thought about what I wanted frequently and intensely. I have often written about it, or written it down. I tuned in to knowledge that can help me, or attract people into my circle who are sympathetic to my goals. Suggestions, advice, and help appeared.
All these actions also changed my behaviour, often in small ways. I notice things that I otherwise wouldn’t. Improve my attitude at work, put in more hours, or become more agreeable. I do things that I previously didn’t do. My diets change. My habits change. I change.
Positive thinking is simply moving from “I can’t do this” to “How can I do this?”
And given enough time, the pieces of what I desire starts to fall into place.
Final thoughts
Looking back, I realised that as an optimistic person; I look on the bright side of things. When I am overly pessimistic, unhappy things happen. Because there is Murphy’s Law: “Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.” If I keep thinking about the downside, it also usually happens. It works both ways.
The Law of Attraction is not magic or divine grace. It is just psychology.
So I now practise mindfulness often. I am careful with my thoughts. I look out for how things could go right. I write my goals on paper, and put them where I can see them. I remind myself that no matter how bad things may appear, it will get better. I am positive.
I am optimistic. And I manifest.
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